I've been doing this for so many times, I'm surprised that I'm still doing it, and not being sick of it, yet. This is turning into a routine I'm not very proud of, and yet, I still do it.
I'm talking about posting new entries in this blog just to keep it alive. New entries just to keep this thing running, just to keep this little extension of my own self in the Internet.
I can tell, and I bet most of you can tell too, that I did a lousy job of making this journal frequently updated. I guess it's just typical of me; this happened to other stuff that I want to do but until now are still unfinished or even not started yet.
I know myself, and I know myself well. I have a bad habit that up till today, I am still trying to get rid of: Laziness and procrastination. Yes, yes, you may think that this is no big deal, since other people (read: you included) also indulged themselves in this kind of habit. Even if I am guilty of procrastinating, I am not the only one. That, I do agree.
However, I do believe that my level of laziness goes a level or two deeper that the laziness level most people would rather associate themselves with.
It's not like I don't want to blog all the time. I do want to. Well, not all the time, but at least more frequently that the current frequency that I'm up to now. Except that, every time I feel like blogging, or hit on some ideas that would look good as an entry, for the most part, I won't post them immediately. I would dwell on it first, see if I can develop it further and expand it to cover more points, as well as to make it more relevant. Problem is, as I delay more and more of the publication of the entry that I want to post, then less urgent it feels for me to post the entry, and the more likely it will be that I won't post the entry at all, simply because I no longer feel like doing it!
Damn!
You know the drill. If you refrain from doing something long enough, in the end you won't do it at all.
I dunno. I'm out of Ideas now. I dunno how on earth am I going to improve myself over this debacle. I've been fighting against it for a very long time, and it doesn't look like I'm gonna win it any time soon. This extends beyond the need for me to blog more frequently; my life in the real world is also affected. I need help on this. Really need help on this.
